i seriously don't know whether i should or not get pissed.
my dear friend, i'm really sorry, you know, if I had gotten on your nerves.
i do not seem to be able to ravel through this. have i been domineering or agressive in our discussions? if you notice, I make it a point to get everyone involved, and that seriously includes you when I think you are lost. i do what i think i should when i see the discussion going off wire by rephrashing and trying to get it back on path. have i wasted too much of your time with it then? please let me know if i have, the discussions are indeed too long i agree, but this proj is not too engineering as many of this sem's proj are, so if you think this can be managed solely by splitting work and not having discussions to ensure the understanding, then i cant argue you through coz i think otherwise.
or let me see, have i been too harsh on you? hey friend, i never will see you as just a project mate you know. and that's past the line of friendship that even binds me on being a nice project mate. but sometimes things has to be delivered and thats why tasks are allocated. i am really not sure why my fault lies, but hopefully you can see that i'm not trying to cannibalize you or having taken you for granted in the project group because of the friendship between us. seriously, do you know that for this report, i felt like i've typed half of its content, and that wasted the whole of yesterday when i had initially wanted to do 3 projects in a day, plus i even had to reject request to go out just because i have not finished typing my part. i'm not saying this to point out anyone who is at fault, for i fully understand it is up to me to type out my segment, and the time taken depends fully on myself to maximize.
or was it not the work allocation, but the last minute allocation i have given you that has pulled you to this last straw of exploding at me. having spent one day typing just 10 pages, I seriously do not want to spend another hour even at this module. And I admit that looking at the combined report less your segment, the part i have yet to get from you seems to be the least. and since everyone has submitted their parts to me, it makes it even more justifiable to request this out of you. a conclusion requires just a brief through of what has been covered, and can i foresee it as just a one or two paragraph thing to sum up with given your language standards. Did you know why also that you will be the last to edit the report, because given any mistakes that we have overlooked while editing, you could assist us by filling up the loophole and smoothening the language. is this not agreeable?
i have taken the time before and while typing this post to reflect as you had requested, and I really cant dig out the problem that is bothering you. if i were to extend out into our daily lives, there were probably some instances when i have moodswings and am grumpy that had affected you. as my character is, often in those times, i just needed to be left alone, to take a breather, and be back to normal. how much do you understand me? how much do you know about my personal life? do you even know that I have broken up with my ex? no, you don't. you are not sensitive enough to pick up my hints of befalling silence when you talk about him. and with that very reason for ill-knowledge that still exposes me to his name, which saddens me especially if I had to tell you of the truth. it is just me being more sensitive than many others, which is why i could be easily affected by things people arnt, and especially for your case oh which I seem to notice you are very much less sensitive.
maybe somewhere out there, the reason(s) that had gotten you so pissed had also been the reason(s) that had led me to hear some unfavourable things from the #3. i believe that a person can never be perfect in everyone's eye, and somewhere out there are things I have wrongly done/said that have picked up in people's heart. i could easily explode with that tone i get an hour ago, but i really wish to understand the problem out there. same for the things i've heard which i had eventually decided not to venture in further to clarify. seriously, as I had told you before, if you want me to truly understand, you've got to be alittle vocal and explain things out. Now that i am asking and taking the time to listen, it just takes your part to explain it out. I do not hope for things to sour just because of this project, and moreso if it has to do with me, it will really help that you can point out what you see negative in your friend and thus allow myself to improve, or if wrongly 'accused', can allow the chance to clear up my name. an hour has been spent but not conclusion has yet been sumed up to.
for the very reason that i see a possible raise in my tone if i were to respond you there and then, I had chosen not to do it in case this situation sinks deeper down, down, down.......
我不停的举手发问
却没有人
告诉我答案
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